Into the Wilderness: Story 47 When you grow up in a family with rage, the violence festers inside you. It fuses with your genes, a biological link now passable to future generations. I know this because I am the angry daughter of a furious man. I have borne a child who simmers and seethes; angerContinue reading “The violence inside”
Tag Archives: trauma
The Ridge- REPUBLISHED
Into the Wilderness: Story 6 Our rented SUV was one of the last in the parent caravan. We drove along winding paved roads until we turned off onto dirt pathways, passing white clapboard houses nestled among the hills, weathered with moss, a lone horse, a few sheep hugging dilapidated barns. Then, we turned onto pittedContinue reading “The Ridge- REPUBLISHED”
Sunshine- Republished
Into the Wilderness: Story 4 When Catina went into the wilderness, we did too. Our wilderness was inside us, the intricate branching of thought and memory that builds up over time. The feelings we had pushed aside- that most adults push aside- sprouted like seedlings in sun. I became aware of my part. I haveContinue reading “Sunshine- Republished”
Hi, it’s me
Into the wilderness: Story 42 With the latest family incident, I have concluded: I am the problem. Immediately, Taylor Swift’s “Anti-Hero” ricochets through my head: “It’s me, hi, I’m the problem.” I am a trauma magnet. I say ”magnet” because the trauma happens around me, to my closest family and friends. By extension, these areContinue reading “Hi, it’s me”
Twenty-one- Republished
Into the Wilderness: Story 3, Mom Week 3 was the hardest. That’s 21 days. It takes 21 days, the saying goes, to form a habit. Up to 21 days for butterflies to grow in their chrysalis. Twenty-one days for the average house fly to live its entire life. It took 21 days for Catina toContinue reading “Twenty-one- Republished”
Moonshine- Republished
Into the Wilderness: Story 2 When I think of moonshine it’s not bootleg whiskey that comes to mind. It’s the bold calling of the moon through the sugar maples and hemlocks on the Blue Ridge mountains. Late summer heat and humidity be damned, Catina, Chuck and I snuggled together on her sleeping bag looking atContinue reading “Moonshine- Republished”
Resiliency hangover?
Into the the wilderness: Story 37 One of my strengths has been resilience. If you’ve read the wilderness entries of Walk the Moon, you’ll see that my family and I have been through a lot- and those entries are only a few of many dramatic and traumatic events, with some good times for imagined balance.Continue reading “Resiliency hangover?”
The MOMA, a Professor, and My Daughter- Updated
Into the Wilderness: Story 32 On Wednesdays and Fridays, Catina travels into New York City for a city semester focused on art history, art production and the artist’s life. She has loved these classes, meeting artists, seeing artists’ lofts firsthand- they are all messy- exploring great art and the business of art. Catina is notContinue reading “The MOMA, a Professor, and My Daughter- Updated”
Walking the Moon Again
Into the Wilderness: story 30 When I started this blog four years ago, I was writing mostly to recover from Catina’s assault, an event that led to a healing journey across multiple states and therapeutic centers; numerous psychometric and psychological assessments; and even a lawsuit. It was unfamiliar typography- craggy and airless, hard to getContinue reading “Walking the Moon Again”
Walk the Moon 